College review:

I don't think I know anyone my age who has decided not to go to college, so to keep my finger on the pulse of the community (and not up my ass), I have visited NYU and Pratt campuses, to see what the "institutions" are like. I put institution in quotes because Pratt is actually built like a mental asylum, from the flourescent lighting and off-beige paint in the hallways to the student eatery that is 2 STORIES UNDERGROUND, the Pratt campus is like a set from a horror movie. However, the truly scary aspect of Pratt is no monster or psycho, but the ridiculously stupid and annoying "students." I won't name any names, but my god, I've never seen such a group of lifeless people in my life. They definitely can spell party without Pratt. I give this school a 2/10, for a horribly depressing campus, a boring student body, and the fact that if Nikolai is not failing yet, they have absolutely no academic standard whatsoever.

Speaking of institutions for the braindead, my next item is NYU. I could go on and on about how those bastards have all but ruined the areas in which they have placed their dens, but that's an old hat. My problem is what total squares they all are. So far I'm 2/2 for forceful ejections. I give this school a 4/10. Same rating as above, but +2 for letting me see Godzilla for free.

P.S. I changed it oliver, FUCK YOU!!!